Thursday, December 29, 2022

A LIGHT IN THE FOREST by Melissa Payne

 

MY THOUGHTS

I'm a huge fan of Melissa Payne's books. They always draw me in and tear at my heart. The Night of Many Endings was one that kept me turning the pages. This one is the same. Pulled me in and held me captive until the very ending. 

Favorite line:
ALL THESE YEARS HELPING OTHERS, AND WHEN IT CAME DOWN TO IT, SHE HADN'T LEARNED HOW TO HELP HERSELF.

This book has a few things going on but is very easy to follow. It's told from two different time periods and two different people. Back in 1995 by Donna who is a runaway. Her dad has been abusing her horribly and she can't take it anymore. Then we jump ahead to 2021 and meet Vega who has left an abusive relationship. She has a two month old baby boy and is on the run from her boyfriend. 

Vega and her mother traveled around all over the place helping women escape abusive relationships. Renee, Vega's mom, didn't have much faith in most men. They meant trouble and were usually abusive. At least that was what she had learned in life. She taught her daughter to help others. To not take things off of men. Pretty much to be strong. But Vega was not strong alone. After her mom died she didn't know what to do. She had always been with her and they had always traveled everywhere helping others. To be alone was a bit scary for her so when she met Zach she did not see the warning signs. When things went south though she heard her mom saying for her to RUN!!! Run she did. All the way to Crystal, Ohio. She had found the name of this town on a picture of her mom when she was just a kid. A young teen.

Vega hopes to learn something about her mom here in Chrystal but no one seems to know her at all. The people in this town are pretty good though. Eve owns a coffee house and rents Vega an apartment. Heff is the local part time cop and yard artist and somewhat of a realtor. Mostly it seems he helps others. Eve has a farm and is a trans. Some people in this town hate her. Others accept her as she is. She is from Crystal but was gone for many years. Vega and Crystal become fast friends. 

A lot happens in this story and you will meet a lot of not so nice people. There is a bit of animal abuse. Just once but still. It was not nice to read but I understand why the author added it. There is homophobia and sexual abuse too. There are some people you will love to hate and some that will make your heart feel full. A couple will grow on you. Parts of this story brought some big tears to my eyes. How a town came together to help touched my heart. How you find out who some of these people are related made me shed some tears. There are also a couple of parts that made me laugh out loud. Not a lot though. The cat fight was funny in its own way. No cats involved. You'll have to read it!

This is a beautifully written story. It will capture your heart and hold on to it throughout. Some parts will make you gasp. Some will make you feel the person's pain. It will have you scratching your head trying to figure out how people can have so much hatred in their hearts while others have so much love. So much to give. So much kindness even in the face of hate. I adored Vega even though she did get on my nerves a few times. Eve I loved. She was awesome. Heff was just good looking and kind. Betty and Carl were the perfect couple. Even Jane came around finally. Each of these people will leave a mark on your heart. If you let them. 

This world needs more love and understanding. Less judgement and hate. This book made me see things that I don't usually see. Understand some things that I just never thought much about. Maybe I should. Maybe we all should. We definitely need to learn to love each other without name calling and labels. Life's just too short for it.

Thank you #NetGalley, #MelissaPayne, #LakeUnionPublishing for this ARC. This is my own true thoughts about this book.

5 huge stars. A very high recommendation. Read it. Shed a few tears. Understand that we all can't be the same.

SYNOPSIS

From Melissa Payne, bestselling author of The Night of Many Endings, comes an emotional and suspenseful novel about the weight of secrets and the healing power of friends and family.

Vega Jones escapes an abusive relationship with nothing but her two-month-old baby and the van she grew up in. Her destination is a small Ohio town her late vagabond mother left years ago. It’s one full of nobodies, her mother warned. That makes it the ideal refuge for Vega to lie low, feel safe, and maybe learn more about a past her mother never spoke of.

Vega warms to the town and to new acquaintances like Heff, the young deputy and artist who prefers his yard art to actual policing, and empathetic Eve, a local farmer whose near-death experience gave her more than just her life back. But even in this welcoming community, there’s an undercurrent of something unsettled, talk of a tragedy that unfolded in the woods years ago, and a mystery connected to Vega in ways she couldn’t have anticipated.

As a mother on the run and following a path of mounting risks and illuminating secrets, Vega discovers that even during the darkest of times, there’s light in unexpected places.




Monday, December 26, 2022

Mailbox Monday

Mailbox Monday is the gathering place for readers to share the books that came into their house last week.

Warning: Mailbox Monday can lead to envy, toppling TBR piles, and humongous wish lists!!
Mailbox Monday, created by Marcia @ A Girl and Her Books, has a permanent home now at Mailbox Monday.
 ************
Here’s a shout out to the administrators:
Emma @ Words And peace
************
                THANKS to everyone for keeping Mailbox Monday alive.

1: IT'S ONE OF US by J. T. Ellison
    courtesy of NetGalley 
2: THE ECHO OF OLD BOOKS by Barbara Davis
   courtesy of NetGalley
3: THESE STILL BLACK WATERS by Christina McDonal
     courtesy of NetGalley
4: GONE TONIGHT by Sarah Pekkanen
     courtesy of NetGalley
5: THE LONDON SEANCE SOCIETY by Sarah Penner
     courtesy of NetGalley
6: THE HOUSE OF EVE by Sadeqa Johnson
     courtesy of NetGalley
7: THE BLOCK PARTY by Jamie Day
     courtesy of NetGalley
8: THE ONLY SURVIVORS by Megan Miranda
     courtesy of NetGalley


Saturday, December 24, 2022

THE WIDOWMAKER by Hannah Morrissey

 

My thoughts

This is the second book by this author. The first being Hello, Transcriber, which I haven't read yet. I hope too.

This story is told by Morgan, a photographer, and Hudson who is a cop. It starts out with Morgan fleeing Chicago and going back home to Black Harbor. 

Morgan is hired to photograph the Reynolds family's Christmas party. They are rich and Morgan could make a lot of money doing this. She was a gift for the mother from her son Bennett. I wondered for a while just who gives another human as a gift but with this story I found out. Not a gift in an ugly way mind you. The gift of the party being photographed. Bennett knew who Morgan was in Chicago though he had not met her until she arrived at their family home. Morgan is greeted with open arms by most of the Reynolds family but there are a couple who have very sinister feelings toward her. 

Morgan had a horrible upbringing. She was left with an aunt who was cruel to her after her mother deserted her. Her dad abandoned her also. Her parents were not married but it seemed they might have loved each other a bit. But did either care about Morgan really? I actually loved how Morgan's aunt died though I think she should have suffered. Maybe she did. Imagination can help here. Morgan is also described in a kind of goth way. The way she dresses and the piercings she has. Or she's just very expressive maybe. She sounded very pretty and tough. I liked her a lot. She was not a whinny type person. She was one that did what she had to to survive. 

Hudson we meet at the scene of his best friend and partner's murder. He is a bit sick about it. Literally. Detective Garrison was gunned down in a connivence store during what appears to be a robbery. Hudson and Garrison had been partners for a long time and Garrison was like a father to Hudson. He was determined to bring justice for Garrison's family. Of course he could not work on the case and was put on a cold case, what happened to Hudson Reynolds.. Did he just up and leave or was he dead? 

Hudson has, what I found to be, a horrible family. His mother seems to hate that he's a good guy while his brother is the towns biggest drug dealer. Go figure right. Hudson has a history also but not a bad one. He has suffered a couple of losses that are so sad. I felt for him and really liked him. He is described as a bit on the nerdy side. Not that he's not tough but he's not described as your typical buffed up big headed cop. He wants to know who killed Garrison. He wants to know what happened to Reynolds. He won't stop until there is closure. 

Hudson and Morgan meet the night his partner is killed. She was a witness in a way. She saw something that will help bring justice for Garrison. Maybe even bring justice for things that happened to her as a child. 

There are things in this book about child sexual abuse and just abuse that are not vivid but you get the gest of it. You know what happened. In a way there was a little bit of justice at The Ruin. Just a bit though. I'll never understand how a family member can let these things happen to anyone much less a little child but it does happen. Grownups can be so cruel. Sick grownups. Ugly grownups. Horrible ones. There is also the cop killing. He put his life on the line every single day and right before his retirement he was killed. I felt so bad for him and his family. I did like finding out what his final three words meant. It helped.

This book gives closure with most of what is going on. I did wish it had more about the Reynolds and whether they got to know Morgan better. Or how they felt about what she did to survive. Or what they felt about a family member or members doing things. I also wish the very ending would have told me whether someone arrived. My guess is yes. And only good things happened after that. 

This book has some emotion in it. It's sad in lots of places. It's about murder, child abuse, child sexual abuse, family secrets, acceptance maybe. Closure possibly. Closure for two families anyway. Also and by far not least adoption. How one family took in a child that needed a lot of care and patience. I liked this family, especially the grandpa.

Thank you #NetGalley, #HannahMorrissey, #StMartinsPress #Minatourbooks for this ARC. This is my own true thoughts about this book.

4 stars and I recommend it. It will keep you wondering for sure.

Synopsis

A wealthy family shrouded in scandal; a detective tasked with solving an impossible cold case; and a woman with a dark past collide in Hannah Morrissey's stunning Black Harbor mystery, The Widowmaker.

Ever since business mogul Clive Reynolds disappeared twenty years ago, the name "Reynolds" has become synonymous with "murder" and "mystery." And now, lured by a cryptic note, down-on-her-luck photographer Morgan Mori returns home to Black Harbor and into the web of their family secrets and double lives. The same night she photographs the Reynolds holiday get-together, Morgan becomes witness to a homicide of a cop that triggers the discovery of a long-buried clue.

This could finally be the thing to crack open the chilling cold case, and Investigator Ryan Hudson has a chance to prove himself as lead detective. If only he could stop letting his need to solve his partner's recent murder distract him. But as Morgan exposes her own dark demons, could her sordid history be the key to unlocking more than one mystery?



Monday, December 19, 2022

SOMEONE HAD TO DO IT by Amber and Danielle Brown

 


Someone Had to Do It 
Authors: Amber and Danielle Brown
ISBN: 9781525899966
Paperback Original 
Publication Date: December 27, 2022
Publisher: Graydon House

Brandi Maxwell is living the dream as an intern at prestigious New York fashion house Simon Van Doren. Except “living the dream” looks more like scrubbing puke from couture dresses worn by hard-partying models and putting up with microaggressions from her white colleagues. Still, she can’t help but fangirl over Simon’s it-girl daughter, Taylor. Until one night, at a glamorous Van Doren party, when Brandi overhears something she shouldn’t have, and her fate becomes dangerously intertwined Taylor’s.

 

Model and influencer Taylor Van Doren has everything…and is this close to losing it all. Her fashion mogul father will donate her inheritance to charity if she fails her next drug test, and he’s about to marry someone nearly as young as Taylor, further threatening her stake in the family fortune. But Taylor deserves the money that’s rightfully hers. And she’ll go to any lengths to get it, even if that means sacrificing her famous father in the process.

 

All she needs is the perfect person to take the fall…


A December LibraryReads Pick

Readers Digest Online, 27 Best Mystery Books You Won’t Be Able to Put Down



"will have you turning pages as fast as you can....With biting social commentary and critiques of capitalism and privilege, this juicy, intelligent novel is utterly compelling." -Readers Digest Online, 27 Best Mystery Books You Won’t Be Able to Put Down



"Inspired by their time in the New York fashion scene, influencers Amber and Danielle Brown have crafted a taut and sexy debut thriller about a young Black woman struggling to make it in that cutthroat industry....Fresh dialogue, extravagant parties, and an inside view of the glamorous lives of the filthy rich grab the reader’s attention from start to finish.” -BOOKLIST


“Sister team Amber and Danielle Brown bring their own experiences of the fashion industry into this fast-paced and intriguing thriller.… Brandi is a well-developed protagonist who will be admired for her resolve and ambition….Fans of Alyssa Cole and Zakiya Dalila Harris, whose characters navigate the issues women of color face in the workplace, and of psychological thrillers like Paula Hawkins’s The Girl on the Train will enjoy this one.” –LIBRARY JOURNAL


"A disturbing peek into the world of privilege. Someone Had to Do It is a tense page-turner that had me yelling out loud at the characters."

-Lucinda Berry, bestselling author of The Best of Friends and The Perfect Child


"Someone Had to Do It has everything. A dark and riveting page turner that has the allure of pulling off the perfect crime with an intelligent twist."

--Nadine Matheson, author of THE JIGSAW MAN and THE BINDING ROOM


"Amber and Danielle Brown’s debut is a juicy, brilliant treat of a thriller that combines sexy fashion-world glamour with salient points about privilege, racism, and the corrosive effects of extreme wealth. Somehow, Someone Had to Do It manages to be both a scathing critique of our late-stage capitalist hellscape, and the perfect mental escape from it. I couldn’t put it down!"

-Layne Fargo, author of They Never Learn


 


Authors’ Bio: 


Amber and Danielle Brown both graduated from Rider University where they studied Communications/Journalism and sat on the editorial staff for the On Fire!! literary journal. They then pursued a career in fashion and spent five years in NYC working their way up, eventually managing their own popular fashion and lifestyle blog. Amber is also a screenwriter, so they live in LA, which works out perfectly so Danielle can spoil her plant babies with copious amount of sunshine.


Social Links:

Author Website: https://www.amberanddanielle.com/ 

Twitter: https://twitter.com/ambersharelle 

https://twitter.com/dani_nicbrown 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amberanddanielle/ 

Goodreads



BRANDI

I had a ton of illusions, vivid fantasies of what it would be like to score a coveted internship at Van Doren. Deluded old me thought I would be strutting around the stunning tri-story headquarters in single-soled heels, flitting from design concept meetings to on-location photo shoots, living my best fashion-girl life. Instead, I’m in the back corner of the two-thousand-square-foot ready-to-wear samples closet scrubbing fresh vomit from a slinky gown worth double my rent during my lunch hour.

Italian Vogue’s current cover girl borrowed the hand-sewn dress for a red-carpet event last night, and apparently getting it back on a rack without ruining it was too much for one of the other interns to handle. She was so hungover when she came to the office this morning that she vomited all over the dress before making it out of the elevator. But of course this dress needs to be ready for another model to wear to some big extravaganza tonight, and since I’m the designated fuckover intern, I have to clean it by hand because the satin-blend fabric is too delicate to be dry-cleaned.

This is what it takes.

I chant this to remind myself why I’m here as the lactic acid builds up in my biceps. Working for Van Doren has been on my proverbial vision board ever since I reluctantly gave up the idea, in middle school, that I could be Beyoncé. It’s a storm of hauling hundreds of pounds of runway samples around the city and sitting in on meetings with the sketch artists. A glorious, next-to-holy experience when I’m on duty at photo shoots and one of the stylists sends me to fetch another blazer, not a specific blazer, which means I get to use my own vestiary inclinations to make the selection. Which has only happened once, but still.

Just as I get the stain faded by at least seventy percent, I hear the sharp staccato of someone in stilettos approaching. I turn around and see Lexi. Lexi with her bimonthly touched-up white-blond hair and generous lip filler that she’ll never admit to having injected. When she steps closer in her head-to-toe Reformation, I am grateful that I remembered to put on a few sprays of my Gypsy Water perfume. The one that smells like rich people. But the way she’s staring at me right now, it’s clear that no matter how much I try, I am still not on her level. I do not fit in here. She does not see me as her equal, despite the fact that we are both unpaid, unknown, disposable interns. It’s become glaringly obvious that at Van Doren, it’s not actually about what you contribute, but more about how blue your blood is. Lexi doesn’t even know my name, though I’ve been here a solid nine weeks and I’m pretty sure I’ve told her at least a dozen times.

I’m already on edge because of my assignment, so I jump in before she can ask in her monotone voice. “Brandi.”

“Right,” she says, like she does every time yet still forgets. “Chloé wants the Instagram analytics report for last week. She said she asked you to put it together an hour ago.”

Which is true, but completely unfair since Jenna from marketing also asked me to run to Starbucks to buy thirty-one-ounce cups of liquid crack for her and her entire department for a 9:00 a.m. meeting, an effort that took three trips total, and technically I’m still working on the data sheets I promised Eric from product development. Not to mention the obvious: getting rid of the puke from the dress.

“I’m still working on it,” I tell her.

Lexi stares at me, her overly filled brows lifted, as if she’s waiting for the rest of my excuse. I understand her, but also I’m wondering how she still hasn’t realized this is not a case of Resting Bitch Face I have going on, that I am actually intolerant of her nagging.

Normally, I am not this terse. But nothing about today has been normal. Since this week is my period week, I’m retaining water in the most unflattering of places and the pencil dress I’m wearing has been cutting off the circulation in my thighs for the past couple of hours, and being that I’ve spent most of my break destroying the evidence of someone else’s bad decisions, it is not my fault that I’m not handling this particularly well.

“I’ll send it over as soon as I’m done,” I say to Lexi so she can leave. But she doesn’t.

“HR wants to see you,” she says with what looks like a smirk.

My mouth opens. I have no idea what HR could want, and although I’m still new to this employee thing, I know this can’t be good.

“Like, now,” Lexi barks and pivots away in her strappy, open-toe stilts.

I hang the sample next to the door, and before I leave the room I pause to briefly take in the rest of the dresses stuffed on the racks, each one in that chic, elevated aesthetic that is the cornerstone of Van Doren. This is my favorite part of the day, the chaotic nature of this room a little overwhelming but also inspiring, and I can’t wait for the day that this is my world, not just one I’m peeking my head into. A world in which I command respect.

I cross through the merchandising department, where everyone has their own private office with aerial views of Hell’s Kitchen, Soho and the Garment District, and then move through the maze of the sprawling suite in a mild sort of panic until I remind myself that I have done nothing wrong. Ever since spring semester ended, I’ve been putting in more hours than the sun. I slip in at six-thirty when the building is dark and vaguely ominous, my eyes still puffy with sleep, and when I finally drag myself into the elevator at the end of the day, it’s just as black and quiet outside. I religiously show up in current-season heels despite the blisters, albeit mass-produced renditions of the Fendi, Balenciaga and Bottega Venetas the other summer interns casually strut around in, and mostly stick to myself. I am careful about raising my voice, even if I vehemently disagree with my neurotic supervisor. I keep my tongue as puritanical as a nun’s, even when fucking incel or coddled narcissistic bitch are on the tip of it. I’m not rude or combative. I stay away from gossip. I complete all my tasks with time to spare, which is usually when I check Twitter and help out some of the other interns, even though I’d rather FaceTime Nate in the upstairs bathroom with the magical lighting. I even entertain the gang of sartorially inclined Amy Coopers in the making who insist on obnoxiously complaining to me about all of their first-world, one-percenter problems. I’ve done nothing but consistently given them reasons to think I am a capable, qualified, talented intern who would make an exceptional employee.

I have nothing to worry about.

When I knock on the door to Lauren’s office, she looks up from her desk and waves me in through the glass. I have a feeling this will not go my way when I see that my supervisor, Chloé, one of the more amiable assistants, is also here, fiddling with her six-carat engagement ring in the corner and avoiding eye contact.

“Have a seat, Brandi,” Lauren says, and I tell myself to ignore that her bright pink lipstick extends above her lip on one side.

There is no small talk. No hello or how’s it going? Under alternate circumstances, I would feel slighted, but because I’m growing more anxious by the second, I’m grateful for her smugness.

As I sit down, Chloé shifts in her chair, and I speak before she can. “I’m sorry. The Instagram report is at the top of my task list. I’ll definitely have it to you before I leave today. I just—”

“That’s not why you’re here, Brandi,” Lauren interjects.

“Oh.” I pause, and as she glances down at her notes, I try to make meaningful eye contact with my supervisor, but she is still actively dodging my eyes.

Lauren begins by throwing out a few compliments. My work ethic is admirable and I have great attention to detail, she says, and the whole time my heart is pounding so loud, I can barely make out most of her words. Chloé jumps in to effusively agree, then Lauren finally stops beating around the bush and looks me directly in the eyes.

“We just don’t feel like you’re fitting into the culture here at Van Doren.”

Every word feels like a backhanded slap across the face, the kind that twists your neck and makes the world go still and white for a few disconcerting moments, like an orgasm but not like an orgasm. It’s obvious what they mean, yet can’t quite bring themselves to say.

They just don’t like that I’m black.

They don’t like the way I wear my braids—long and unapologetic, grazing my hips like a Nubian mermaid.

They don’t like that I’m not the smile-and-nod type, willing to assimilate to their idea of what I should be, how I should act.

Culture.

That’s their code for we-can’t-handle-your-individuality-but-since-we-don’t-want-to-seem-racist-we’ll-invent-this-little-loophole.

Black plus exceptional equals threat.

“If we don’t see any improvement in the coming weeks, we’re going to have to let you go,” Lauren says with no irony, her mouth easing into a synthetic smile.

I blink. I cannot believe this is happening right now. It wasn’t supposed to go like this, my internship at Van Doren, the one fashion company whose ethics align with mine. I wasn’t just blowing smoke up Lauren’s ass when I interviewed for this job, though I was looking at her sideways, wondering why she had not a stitch of Van Doren on. I’d splurged on a single-shouldered jumpsuit from this year’s spring collection that I couldn’t really afford just to impress her, while she hadn’t even felt the need to represent the brand at all as she shot out all those futile questions interviewers love propelling at candidates, I’m convinced, just to see them squirm. Even minuscule amounts of power can be dangerous.

This is bullshit, being put on probation, and I’d give anything to have the balls to call them on it. As I sit here paralyzed, Lauren’s words reverberate in my head and I rebuke them, want to suffocate and bury them.


Buy Links:

HarperCollins.com 

BookShop.org

Barnes & Noble

Amazon

Books-A-Million

IndieBound




Mailbox Monday

Mailbox Monday is the gathering place for readers to share the books that came into their house last week.

Warning: Mailbox Monday can lead to envy, toppling TBR piles, and humongous wish lists!!
Mailbox Monday, created by Marcia @ A Girl and Her Books, has a permanent home now at Mailbox Monday.
 ************
Here’s a shout out to the administrators:
Emma @ Words And peace
************
                THANKS to everyone for keeping Mailbox Monday alive.

Received 

1: THE MAGIC KINGDOM by Russell Banks
    Courtesy of the Publisher via NetGalley
2: HART'S RIDGE by Kay Bratt
    received from the author
3: THE NIGHT TRAVELERS by Armando Lucas Correa
    Courtesy of the Publisher via NetGalley
4: THE WOODS ARE WAITING by Katherine Greene
    Courtesy of the Publisher via NetGalley
5: DARK CORNERS by Megan Goldin
    Courtesy of the Publisher via NetGalley

Book Mail this week

1: LOOKING FOR JANE by Heather Marshall
    Courtesy of the Publisher 
 




A Court Of Mist And Fury-Audio by Sarah J. Maas (Parts One & Two)

  My thoughts I listened to both audios. Parts 1 and 2 in graphic audio. They may very well have ruined regular audio for me. It was amazing...